Yesterday I went to the village (a broad term I use for the undisclosed location to which I work with the unreached) with my teammates for the monthly pastor meeting. At least once a month, every month, we have the opportunity and priviledge to go out to our focus district to train and encourage our brothers out there serving as church planters among the unreached people groups. All of them come together in one church for the whole day and go through teachings, trainings, give updates on their church growth and have a time of fellowship with one another. Often times I will go out with World Race teams or other short term teams to visit these men and their house churches, talk to their wives and children and be a part of their world for a night. I think out of the the 14 months I’ve been here, I’ve spent almost 4 of those months in the villages with these men and their congregations. I much prefer it to Hyderabad, (even though I do enjoy being with my team in the city too!) but in my eyes, there just isn’t anything quite like being in the village, these pastors…they are true heroes and I love them a whole heck of a lot.
This is a picture I took tuesday of the brothers. I also made a video, make sure to check it out on my facebook before Saturday when I have to take it down! 
I’ll be honest though and say its been a long road, and God has brought me a long way to get to this place. If you would have told me when I was 10 that one day I would sit in a room with a bunch of middle-aged Indian men, laughing and joking with them about life together I would have laughed and completely disregarded you. Not because it was India (I have always loved to travel); not because I would be in a large group (I’ve always enjoyed public speaking); but because I was completely afraid of older men and had absolutely no consistent example in my life of what Godly male leadership was. The emotional qualifications and growth that I thought must have been required in doing something like that never would have seemed possible to me to achieve. However, that scenario was the reality of my yesterday…in fact, yesterday I stood up in from of my brothers and (after laughing and joking and reunioning with them) taught on the biblical view of manhood.
The day started out with me waking up at 3 am super nauseous and sick. I had just 3 hours before we would catch our train to the village meeting and knew that there was no hope of me being able to fall asleep again after such a violent episode of throwing my guts up, so I sat on my bed and prayed. After praying my regular morning prayers and spending time with God in worship I asked him what he me to share with the pastors.
Here is how that conversation with God went…
God: “I want you to talk to them about their callings as men in the church”.
Me: “Ha! I’m not a man. God, maybe you could ask Brant or Ryan to do that instead?”
God: “Nope, you got this. Go ahead, girl”
With another 2 hours before we were leaving for the train station, I immediately saw myself jumping (in my mind) to Ephesians 6 and thinking about how I could implement these verses about the armor of God into my teaching that day…but then, I developed an uneasiness about it. Unsure if it was God or my aching stomach, I prayed again. This time, I felt led to listen to the 2 stored podcasts (one from my church on Sunday and another from a church in TN) that I already had downloaded on my phone. I spent the next hour and a half listening to two Men that I’ve grown to greatly respect, talk about biblical manhood and design. Knowing that this timing was unmistakably the Lord leading me into the teaching I would give to the pastors later that day, I set aside my mental notes on speaking to them from Ephesians and instead began to reflect on God’s original design for men. As I read Genesis 1 and 2, Romans 8, and 1 Corinthians 2, I was reminded of the beauty behind his intention for men and how it does in fact differ from his intentions for women. My encouragement for woman and our design will have to be saved for another blog on another day, but trust me…I love talking about stepping into womanhood so feel free to reach out to me on this topic!
When I got up to speak, I shared with my Indian brothers what God had spoken to me about that morning and what he had shown me in scripture about their unique place in the church. I explained to them that my heart in talking to them about Manhood was not coming out of a place of knowing what it’s like to be a man….because I have no clue, but rather to come alongside them as a sister, seeing a divine calling over my brothers and desiring to encourage them up in that. My intent in writing this letter (a shorter representation of my teaching yesterday) comes from the same heart, not because I have any clue what you guys go through on a daily basis as Men but because as your sister, I want to come alongside you and remind you that you are different from your female counterparts and have a unique calling on this earth, as sons.
So…here is my letter. If you are a man… friends, family, bloggers…this is for you.
Dear Man of God,
You were created by God with a specific design in mind.
Before the introduction of sin in this world, God entrusted you to work and keep the land (Gen 2:15) meaning your desire to work and work hard was not as a punishment, but as a gift. You were designed to live out a calling, to carry a specific load from God. Without discovering that calling, you are left with a design that will search for something else to carry.
I remember this one time I went home during college and found my little brother riding his toy wagon in the living room. He sat on the front of the wagon which carried his legos and blocks and used his legs to push himself across the floor. When he unloaded the wagon on the opposite side of the room, he tried to return in the same manner but instead of taking him where he wanted to go, the wagon just wavered side to side and was hard to control. Eventually he got up because he realized it didn’t work as well without the load in the back of the wagon. I know that is just a metaphor but to me it is also representative of your design and how God created you. You were made to carry God’s purpose over your life and if you refused to carry that or instead carry things that were never meant to be a part of your load (whether that be an abuse of alcohol, or your job you know you are settling in, or that relationship you keep falling back on, etc.) you wont really be able to feel fulfilled in the life you are living.
It’s important that you step into that calling, not just for your sake but for the sake of the church as a whole. The body has many members, and your gifts/talents and calling offer something unique to the body of Christ that no one else can offer.
As a woman, I’ve seen how often my male friends will settle for something less than the load God has called them into because they feel like they’ve made too many mistakes or have had too few chances to really prove to themselves and God how well they can do. I believe this is how the enemy wants to attack the men in our churches. You have been called to lead. That takes on many forms, but there is no mistaking the fact that you are called to lead…and not just in marriage but in church and in your communities. By making you think that you aren’t qualified or worthy to do that, Satan steals a very important part of the load God has already deemed you worthy to carry.
In order to pick up your calling, you really have to forgive yourself and trust in who God has made you to be. Let me repeat that first part…you have to forgive yourself. I promise you that your mistakes, your history, your faults are not things that God holds on to (Psalm 103:12). He has removed your transgressions from you as far as the east is from the west, and by holding onto them and not stepping into freedom Jesus purchased for you on the cross you are robbing woman, the church and the world of God’s design for you too. One of my brothers here is a former terrorist. He killed many Christians for many years but now he has been washed clean, made new and not a single one of us would hold any of his past against him…we love him, he’s amazing actually and has invested a lot into my life personally. Yesterday, he brought me a box of sweets to thank me for praying over his wife’s womb because they just found out that she is pregnant with their first child! I know he will make a great dad, not because of his past but because of who he has entrusted his future with. Please, forgive yourselves and realize that today is a new day. You can ask God for his load, you can watch him help you unload what needs to be unloaded and reload his purposes, plans and desires for your life.
Finally, I know you may feel alone at times or like the load is too much…my brothers here in India do too. To feel that way is not anything to be ashamed of…just don’t sit in that place for too long. Seek truth, discover love and accountability and stand up to make the first step of getting out of that pit. Most of my Indian brother’s congregations are 80%+ women and a lot of times they aren’t able to spend time in fellowship with other Christian men aside from the one day a month when they meet together for this meeting. Nevertheless, God has equipped them to lead those woman and he has equipped you to lead those around you as well. It does not matter if they are men or women or children, your design and gifts will impact the heart of any person God places in your path not because of what you have to offer but because you have been chosen as a vessel for God’s love to pass through you and into the hearts of his sons and daughters. As a man, you words speak differently to the broken. Embrace it. Walk in it.
Lastly, I want to encourage you to remember that you are so, so loved because love truly is everything.
“And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing” -1 Cor 13:2.
You can not truly love others without first knowing love yourself, and the greatest display of love that humanity has ever known was through God sending Jesus to die for you, his son. God did not make you to be any one way, to fit a mold that society calls “manly”. You are you…and a long, long time ago God decided that you, and you alone, were worth sacrificing everything for. You are loved beyond measure, you are who he has chosen to lead this world back to himself and who he has hand picked to be the ones that speak into the hearts of the lost in this world that are desperate to hear the good news that the gospel offers them. Boldly step into your calling, and leave your mistakes behind…the world is waiting to be led to the cross by you, brother.
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline” -2 Tim1:7
Love, one of your sisters in Christ.
P.S
Here are some pictures of my Indian Brothers that we took yesterday. As you can tell, they are some of the most joyful people in the world. Please continue to keep all 72 of them in your prayers! We are also still trying to find people to partner with them by donating $30 a month to cover their petroleum costs to visit the church plants. If you are interested in “adopting a pastor’s transportation costs” and being set up to support one of the brothers, please email me at [email protected].
